Shakespeare on bikes
Mon, 13/09/2010 - 13:55
The prescience of our national poet is the stuff of legend. However, it's a little-known fact that Shakespeare postulated the future discovery of the motorcycle as early as 1603:
"Mine eyes are made the fools o' the other senses,
Or else worth all the rest; I see thee still,
And on thy Blade...
Which was not so before"
Macbeth II,1
The literary critic F. R. Leavis could offer no explanation for the following lines, other than that a copy of Performance Bikes must have rocked up on the Bard's desk one morning, through a wormhole in time:
"Antipholus is mad,
Else would he never so demean himself.
A ring he hath of mine worth forty Ducatis,
And for the same he promised me a [Sold Secure*] chain"
Comedy of Errors IV,3
[*Thatcham Folio edition only]
And the great man even went so far as to predict a less than flawless reliability record for one particular marque:
"I'll lug the Guzzi into the neighbour room.
Mother, good night"
Hamlet III,4
Mon, 13/09/2010 - 23:30
#2
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Not forgetting the Bard's contemporary, renowned for this epithet after being caught over the limit.
John Donne, Speed Gun, Undone.
Tue, 14/09/2010 - 10:22
#3
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
He had a secret preference for Aprilia Sports Tourers, now sadly fallen out of fashion.
'Futura, good night, smile once more; turn thy wheel'
And was an early advocate of traction control:
'But I am bound upon a wheelie of fire,
That mine own tears do scald like molten lead'
Tue, 14/09/2010 - 11:52
#4
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Just sat here (hard at work, thanks) pondering submission of the following entry to the next edition of the OED:
DESDEMONA
Definition-
1. Female lead character in WIlliam Shakespeare's play "Othello".
2. Talented but perpetually complaining rider of Ducati Desmosedici racing motorcycle.
Usage-
e.g. 2. "Stoner's fast, but he can be a right old Desdemona".
Wed, 01/12/2010 - 11:01
#5
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
rocca,
Brilliant demonstration of the flexible nature of the english language.
But STOP! It will already be out-of-date (unlike the Bard himself), by the time the OED's published, unless qualified by the 2011 amendment to "Cross Planer".
Sorry, that should have read 'RC of Honda'.
There's a fascinating paper on 'Shakespeare and Chastity', guaranteed to set Triumph forum members' pulses racing, particularly since it's written by Bonnie.
http://bonnielanderjohnson.blogspot.com/2010/05/academic-articles.html
Kevin might possibly be interested in 'Catholic Mothers Online'.......
Thu, 23/09/2010 - 15:10
#6
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
His famously eccentric stage direction: 'Exit, pursued by a Buell'
Did he foretell the contagion of HiViz on Jackets and Helmets, forsooth?
Tue, 16/11/2010 - 18:46
#7
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
He did seem to foresee the fuelling problems a certain Ducati was going to have: "Out, damn'd flat spot! out, I say!—One; two years: why, then 'tis time to do't.—Hell is lurchy.
Tue, 30/11/2010 - 18:22
#8
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Being a Midlands lad and born not far from Hinckley Shakespeare was into his Triumphs - The plays are littered with mentions ...
e.g. Julius Caesar, Act 1 Scene 1
FLAVIUS
But wherefore art not in thy shop today?
Why dost thou lead these men about the streets?
Cobbler
Truly, sir, to wear out their shoes, to get myself
into more work. But, indeed, sir, we make holiday,
to see Caesar and to rejoice in his Triumph.
Tue, 30/11/2010 - 20:42
#9
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Jon.h, welcome to the Shakespeare study group. We meet here whenever you can spare a few minutes from whatever it is that you really ought to be doing during working hours. Sometimes we discuss motorcycles, too.
On the subject of Shakespeare, Caesar and Triumph, new analysis of Antony & Cleopatra is suggesting that the Roman assault on A & C's forces at the battle of Actium was fully justified by a grave threat to harm the paintwork of the emperor's favourite bike:
Antony: "Vanish, or I shall give thee thy deserving/ And blemish Caesar's Triumph." Antony and Cleopatra IV, 8
I've no doubt that Simon Schama and Dr David Starkey will be logging in shortly to give us the benefit of their views on this fresh insight, which appears to overturn nearly 2000 years' worth of historical scholarship.
Wed, 01/12/2010 - 11:49
#10
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Hotspur in Henry IV Part I, elaborates on the common (in 1555) saying :
"Say the truthe and shame the diuel."
And I can teach thee, coz, to shame the devil
By telling truth: tell truth and shame the devil.
If thou have power to raise him, bring him hither,
And I'll be sworn I have power to shame him hence.
O, while you live, tell truth and shame the devil!
Surely an exhortation to journalists to remain objective and not be swayed by red, carbon or a huge rear tyre.
Wed, 01/12/2010 - 13:16
#11
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Hamlet:
The King doth wake to-night and takes his rouse,
Keeps wassail, and the swagg'ring up-spring reels;
And as he drains his draughts of Rhenish down,
The kettle-drum and trumpet thus bray out
The triumph of his pledge.
Is it a custom?
It would appear that there was some drinking going on whilst dealing with a noisy Suzuki GT750 brake and a Triumph doing donkey impressions. Both appear to be personally modified as well
Wed, 01/12/2010 - 15:06
#12
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Strangely there is a Shakespeare/Harley link too....
Fri, 25/02/2011 - 18:15
#13
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Having sleepness nights anxiously awaiting delivery of your new, blinged-up bike?
Orthopedically compromised by this morning's blast on the sports bike?
Midnight sweats brought on by status envy after reading ashonbikes?
Or worries that the hi-viz jacket and helmet weren't put away in pristine condition after that ride to the shops a week ago?
Then follow this link to a perfect night's sleep:
http://www.shakespearebeds.co.uk
Followed by this:
http://eic.oxfordjournals.org/content/XLIV/4/293.extract
Fri, 25/02/2011 - 19:46
#14
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
I love the bed-Bard comparison of living on for years...
Actually, I hate it... I live about a mile from the Bard's old pad and every single blimmin' thing in Stratford is named after something Shakespeary. There's a new housing estate going up near me, and with a huge leap of imagination they're calling it the Hathaways. Ugh.
Regards from Shakespeare's County.
Sat, 26/02/2011 - 19:02
#15
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Exit, pursued by a bear (with a sore head)!
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears; and sometime voices,
That, if I then had wak’d after long sleep,
Will make me sleep again: and then, in dreaming,
The clouds methought would open and show riches
Ready to drop upon me; that, when I wak’d
I cried to dream again.
The Tempest. Perfection.
Thu, 19/05/2011 - 23:24
#16
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Something from the Merry Wives of Windsor? Too late, alas, for the title to be topical:
"O, what a world of vile ill-favoured faults
Looks handsome in three hundred pounds a month!"
An early warning to potential bike owners (select model of choice), contemplating manufacturers' 0% interest promotions......
Fri, 20/05/2011 - 00:11
#17
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
This week's special guest literary genius is William Blake:
"Love to faults is always blind,
Always is to joy inclin’d,
Lawless, wing’d & unconfin’d,
And breaks all [cam*]chains from every mind."
[*Haynes Mechanics' Institute scholarly edition only.]
Next week: in iambic pentameter, Samuel Beckett's initial musings on the Aprilia RSV4 Factory APRC SE.
Sat, 21/05/2011 - 18:38
#18
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Wonderful, rocca & so apt too.
I wouldn't be surprised if you were nudging me towards quoting some of his most famous lines, doubtless following a road test of yet another Triumph offering (plus visionary comparison with a Victory, Super Tenere & canadian heavy metal band?)
"Tiger, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?
.....
What the hammer? what the chain?
In what furnace was thy brain?
What the anvil? What dread grasp
Dare its deadly terrors clasp?"
Fri, 20/05/2011 - 14:28
#19
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Back to the Bard and entirely for Shuggie's benefit, what about this link?
http://shakespearesmonkeys.com/
Would you credit it?
Fri, 20/05/2011 - 14:30
#20
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
woo hoo - well if ever there was an endorsement that has to be it. I am deeply touched and somewhat humbled. Thank you kind sir.
Wed, 03/08/2011 - 17:09
#21
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Lady Macbeth: I pray you, speak not; he grows
worse and worse;
Question enrages him. At once, good-night:
Stand not upon the order of your going,
But go at once*.
*Lady Macbeth's solution to lastworditis, repetitiveness and flouncing off.
Impossible to imagine that it would ever happen in the here and now....
Wed, 03/08/2011 - 22:51
#22
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
"The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool"
"...there's nothing so becomes a man
As modest stillness and humility"
As You Like It V,1; Henry V III,1
*Lady Macbeth's solution to lastworditis, repetitiveness and flouncing off.
A footnote worthy of inclusion in the Arden edition of Shakespeare. [Or, as the hormonally-challenged student essayist might have it at a moment of Freudian crisis, the "Ardon edition"...]
Fri, 05/08/2011 - 18:58
#23
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
hormonally-challenged
Shame on you, stooping to this level, after imparting bardic wisdom.
But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? Romeo is impotent and requires an Ardon addition.
Sorry.......Fridayitis.
Sat, 06/08/2011 - 00:33
#24
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Shakespeare and bikes
Please Kevin let Bill write one of you road tests.
This web site is too much. One of a kind. You have some very talented members.
Can't stop smiling
JAG
Sat, 06/08/2011 - 12:18
#25
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Ahh I see we've moved on to other literary sources for inspiration...
How about this one from T S Elliot addressing the various members of the motorcycle press (present company excepted,obvs) as "ladies" following yet another "leaked" "spy" shot from the marketing department of their latest new best friends...
The Triumph of Bullshit...
Ladies, on whom my attentions have waited
If you consider my merits are small
Etiolated, alembicated,
Orotund, tasteless, fantastical,
Monotonous, crotchety, constipated,
Impotent galamatias
Affected, possibly imitated,
For Christ's sake stick it up your ass.
:op
Wed, 21/12/2011 - 17:54
#26
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Thomas Stearns, indeed. Who can forget "The Waste Land", his searing indictment of the deficiencies of Piaggio aftersales support?
"Aprilia is the cruelest mount, breeding
Warranty claims
…
Under the brown fog of a winter dawn,
A crowd flowed over London Bridge,
…
There I saw one I knew, and stopped him, crying 'Colaninno!
You who were with me at the shareholders' meeting!
That head gasket you promised me last year,
Has it begun to sprout? Will it be delivered this year?
Or has the sudden frost disturbed your supply chain?'
…
'Do you know nothing? Do you see nothing? Do you remember
Nothing?'"
[Authorial note of no import or merit: One of my schoolteachers used to claim, quite regularly, to have bumped into T S Eliot in Safeway at Headingley, Leeds, during the early 1960s. Being on the scale of probability somewhat akin to reckoning that you've spotted Rossi in the reading room of the Bodleian Library, this assertion was typically greeted with nervous laughter of the kind you might offer while edging to the door in order to escape the presence of a certifiable loon. Only years later did I discover that it was very probably true insofar as Eliot's (English) second wife's folks did hail from the area, and Alan Bennett made similar claims. Just imagine what rarefied debate there was to be had over the merits of competing soap powders, not to mention similes conjured among the loose vegetables…]
Thu, 22/12/2011 - 10:33
#27
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Something for the weekend, Sir?
A dystopian vision from yet another William:
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
Thought that might cheer you all up!
Tue, 10/01/2012 - 19:42
#28
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
Well, after the resounding silence, I should perhaps bring my efforts on this thread to a close. An ideal moment to present the results of important new Bardic research to this illustrious Forum.
In his courting days, Shakespeare would oft take his Scrambler up to Anne Hathaway's cottage. One such night, whilst arduously trysting the night away, he absentmindedly left it propped up against her shed (the bike, the bike - do pay attention!).
When Phoebus' light set Shottery aglow the next morning, some rascal had purloined it.
Years later he attempted to capture it wistfully, nay metaphysically, in Sonnet 53. The prescience with which he is credited is typically present.
"What is your substance, whereof were you made
That millions of strange saddos to you bend?
Since every marque hath, every one its shade
While you but one a Scrambling shadow lend
Describe a GS and its counterfeits
As poorly executed after you;
On Honda's beak, no art of beauty met
Askew, with knobbly tyres, e'en painted blue
Speak of Versys and poison yet mine ear
None doth shadow of your beauty show
But soft, a Super Tenner doth appear
And other truly cursed shapes we know.
In all external grace, you win the heart
But you like none, yes you, will seldom start."
Tue, 10/01/2012 - 20:25
#29
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
This web site is too much. One of a kind. You have some very talented members.
Can't stop smiling
JAG
It's spectacular, isn't it! Absolutely love it, and sorry silvercub, the silence I'm sure is more to do with expounding your genius under the shadow of Christmas - I saw it and I chortled heartily but had no time to express my appreciation, so I'm afraid as I am too fond of being told I have a talented member, you are banned from winding this up, you must continue.
Sun, 04/03/2012 - 16:43
#30
Re: Shakespeare on bikes
I'm thinking of buying a Monster 1100 Evo so sought some advice from Will:
Just before the announcement of the new full termi system ... Brembro's get good write up but Mr S obviously had a few too many drinks at the launch party as he couldn't count the cylinder heads - what a dunce!
Henry IV, Part II Prologue
Rumour is a pipe
Blown by surmises, jealousies, conjectures,
And of so easy and so plain a stop
That the blunt monster with uncounted heads,
The still-discordant wav'ring multitude,
Can play upon it.
Good horn... but don't play with it whilst cornering.. or else
Coriolanus III,1:
The horn and noise o' the monster's, wants not spirit
To say he'll turn your current in a ditch,
And make your channel his?
Advice to Ducati sales team to find new markets? -
Hamlet III,1
Get thee to a nunnery. Go, farewell. Or if thou wilt
needs marry, marry a fool; for wise men know well enough what
monsters you make of them. To a nunnery, go; and quickly too.
Difficult to resit the Termi's :
Hamlet III,4
That monster, custom, who all sense doth eat
Of habits evil, is angel yet in this,
That to the use of actions fair and good
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